We all want things to remain same, afraid of change always. set out to live misery so we can be happy together. I wish I could explain everything in my damn head and be out of the heavyness I feel now, but being no natural speaker dont know how to do it without hurting the dear ones whos life path crosses with mine.
One thing I learned from all this was to hope something that will never happen was always an easy way out of the miseries in this world, cheating is the only way to get out and usually cheating yourself.
Trying to let it go from my mind, staring at this screen and trying not to express my feelings outside this window, I understand what is mean by transfixing between emotions as someone told me before. I never believed in saving for future but when it comes to taking hard decisions its better to cry now than later because crying later means some other is crying now.